Tuesday, June 25, 2013

Chasing Pavements

   That last day of school hung in the air like a dark cloud. It was like those awkward break ups that leave the other person wondering why. Most teenager would be thrilled that the last week of school was canceled, but the circumstances left more of a horrific impression than a positive one. Once Pony was in recovery I thought it was good to pay him a visit. Besides Jelly and Audrey, Pony and I were the only ones in the gang who faced any immediate danger, and I was so thankful that everyone made it out okay.
     "How you doin Pones?" I asked, handing him the string to the Pony-shaped get well balloon I happened to come by at the store.
     "I'm alright. It could be worse." He said.
     "Got that right. Did you happen to recognize who it was?" I ended the sentence with a heavy note, making sure it would linger.
     "If I did I can't remember...PTSD or something." He answered. "Could be a soc.."
     I shook my head, "I don't think it was a soc, he shot and killed of them in my class."
     Pony's eyes darted to mine. "You saw them?"
     "Yeah, three of them barged right in, in the middle of Gatsby. Had a gun pointed at Jelly, Audrey, and I, till the cops interrupted." A shiver ran through my body.
     "I had no idea anyone else was affected." He sounded surprised.
     I shrugged. "The important thing is that we're all okay and you focus on getting better." I gave him a quick friendly kiss on the cheek before leaving.

   I entered the house with the relief that Dallas was waiting for me. He's been my light while I've wondered in the past few months of darkness, and his presence alone made me feel aglow. With my recent near death experience, I told myself that I wasn't going to waste any more time. I had to tell him exactly how I felt about him.  I headed upstairs to my room, but when I opened the door I saw that Dallas wasn't alone. He had Scarlett pressed up against the wall with his pants unbuckled and holding her hands intensely. My purse and keys dropped to the floor as I stumbled over them and down the stairs. I heard foot steps chasing after me, as well as my name being shouted repeatedly, but it was all drowning out. I was out the front door and sprinting so hard I was sure to stumble over my own feet. You knew it was coming Rhyan. You knew what you were getting yourself into that first night when he saved you from the lake. Are you really that surprised? Are you really that stupid? Honestly, I'm surprised he lasted this long, it was just a matter of time. I couldn't stop the wave of thoughts that came crashing over me, nor the tears that escaped down my cheeks. I ran as hard as I could, until my legs gave out and I was crumpled up on the deck sitting on the lake out past the train tracks. My lungs burned, at least I think it was my lungs, it was hard to differentiate between that and the breaking of my heart. You knew he didn't love you. He's Dallas Winston...sleazy and easy, with a hatred for everything and everyone. Why would you be any different? You're just a stupid girl. I couldn't keep the thoughts from running through my head. They forced their way in like a poison, until I couldn't take it anymore and coughed my guts up on the deck. I didn't know what to do, or where to go, or who to talk to, so I did the only thing I could during in times like this. I danced. When I had no one and nothing to pour my heart into, I poured it in to dancing. I had been a dancer ever since that first day of ballet class when I was four years old. My mom loved to watch me dance, it was her most favorite thing. Of course now, I wasn't that little ballet girl, I took classes all the time in Cali. I had professional one-on-one dance instructors. I even competed in a few competitions, and was part of many recitals. Dancing was always there whenever and where ever I needed it. I could hear the music in my head as my body moved about rhythmically. About an hour passed till I finally calmed down enough to think straight. I paced back home, letting off the last of my steam. I was hurt, pissed, and frustrated to no end. I wanted to beat the shit out of that bitch that I'm forced to call family. I wanted to leave a nasty mark on the side of Dallas's face, giving him a taste of the pain that I was feeling. But most of all, I wanted to know why. I peeled out of the driveway in my bright red 67' Chevelle. I knew he'd be at Buck's by now, working the night shift. I sped down the highway. The night sky closed in around me, and fog crept up in the distance. I don't care if he cheated, I still have to tell him that I love him.                

Saturday, June 8, 2013

Just Your Typical Monday

   Five days left. That's it, just five days of school and then we're out for the summer.
   It was like any other Monday. Scarlet and I car-pooled with Audrey, Dawn, and Blair, stuffing our mouths with donuts before peeling into the parking lot.
     Dawn sighed, "Just five more days and then we're rid of this shit hole for three glorious months." I threw my backpack over my shoulder and walked to class. I struggled staying awake through first and second period, but after drooling on my algebra quiz I decided that I was going to have to set some new limits for the next school year.
   "Miss your coffee this morning Thatcher?" Kitty slapped me on the back as she glanced over the answers bubbled in on my quiz.
   "I think I'm gonna have to tell Dal sex on weekends only." I said, yawning.
   "Yeah, good luck with that." Kit smirked.
   
     By the time English had begun my brain was already in sleep mode, which was okay since all we were doing was reading "The Great Gatsby". I followed along, taking in 0% of the words that flashed across my vision. Suddenly, a sharp *bang* pierced the air, coming from the hallway. Everyone's heads shot up, looking around in confusion. Then we heard another, and another. I glanced over at Audrey and Jelly, the noise ringing in my ears. The classroom was in an uproar as students stood to their feet, shoving desks to the side and stumbling to the corners of the room. The teacher was in a hushed panic as she locked the door and turned off the lights, hushing us in the process. We were officially in lock down. I was huddled behind a few desks with Audrey and Jels. Audrey reached down and squeezed my hand. I was trying my best to stay calm. My heart was beating a million times a second and I swear I could see it pop in and out of my chest. I began to think of everyone I knew in the school... okay, Pony and Curly are two halls over in math class. Kit, Bree and Maddie should be in gym...Scarlett and Blair are on the other side of the school, and Dawn, Johnny, and Steve should be down the hall in U.S. History. But are they okay? What if they're not? And who the hell is shooting up the school? Tears filled my eyes. Perhaps one of the last horrors I had ever pictured myself in was now alive and taking place before me. I heard the door knob jiggle as every student's head turned and faced that direction. Everyone's breath caught as if time literally had stood still. After a moment, the noise stopped, everyone's shoulders dropped in relief, but the sound of shattering glass broke the haunting silence as someone busted through the narrow window in the door, and in an instant there were three armed guys entering the room. I cupped my hand over my mouth to keep from screaming. The masked men glanced around, until one pair of eyes fell upon us. He started towards us, but was interrupted by a fellow student who threw his fist into the guys stomach. One of the other masked men responded by releasing two bullets into the student's head. His body crumpled to the floor, a pool of blood growing from it. I couldn't move, I couldn't even look away. I was sure my heart had even stopped beating. He then proceeded in approaching us, pointing a gun in our general direction. I had no idea who lay at center target, and I didn't dare look. I stared at the floor as sobs broke from my throat. What would provoke someone to shoot up a school, to send their friends, teachers, and classmates into such a darkness..fighting for their lives? And why us? This couldn't be the end. I couldn't leave Owen with no real family, and leaving Dallas for a week was torture, what would my death do to him? His face flooded my thoughts. Did he know that I loved him? I had never actually said it, but I feel it every day when I am with him, and even when we are apart. A strong authoritative voice filled the room.
     "Put the gun down!"
I looked up to see a policeman pointing a firearm at the armed stranger standing before me. After a moment more of convincing, he eventually lowered his gun. It looked like the entire Tulsa police force was in my English classroom. About half an hour later we were instructed through the intercom to leave the building. I glanced over at Audrey and Jelly, their bodies still shaking. We found ourselves in a group hug that seemed to last forever, yet not long enough.
   I placed my phone and other belongings I was wearing in the plastic bucket before being searched with the metal detector. I glanced around at the faces that crowded the courtyard. Faces of horror, pain, and all out fear wore upon them. People were hugging their friends and parents who had heard of the tragedy. My vision caught on the familiar faces that lined the other side of the police tape at the end of the parking lot. I burst into a sprint, my feet pressing hard against the pavement until I hit him like a brick wall, my arms wrapping around him. I felt the tension in his body release, as a wave of relief came over him.
     "Are you okay?" he asked. I pulled away so I could look at him, something I thought I may never be able to do again.
     I nodded. "I'm fine." I reached over to hug Owen, thankful that I was alive to do so. Audrey and Jelly had reached us, hugging just about everyone they could. They rest of the gang had heard about the incident on the news and the radio, and then they all came running. We turned to watch the front doors, in hope that everyone we knew would appear through them. I cried as each one of them emerged safe and sound. All of the worry had lifted off of me, until Darry spoke up.
     "Where is Ponyboy?"